Samsung is trying to patent a cell phone that can tell a woman when she's ovulating.

The phone will have ultrasonic or laser based distance sensor and infrared ray temperature sensor installed around it's speaker. Whenever you make a phone call, distance sensor measures the location of the phone relative to your eardrum and infrared sensor measures the temperature inside your eardrum.

The rest is up to the phone software, which processes the measurements, transforms them into BBT records, determines fertile and infertile periods of the menstruation cycle and provides you with recommendations.

I'd like to see how these recommendations will be delivered. Will your phone suddenly start vibrating when you should not have sex? Will it have a special boom-chicka-wow-wow ringer that kicks in for days that it thinks you can't get pregnant?